May 2011
20 posts
Punks
“If I was younger and still had my health they wouldn’t dare treat me like this. I’d have my own book. But there you go, just because I smell funny and can’t make it to the toilet in time. Punks.”
This was something from a Monty Python book my parents had. Predating 1976, it was the first time I had ever seen the word “punk”. And so I misunderstood it. I...
Ernie Otherwise
Morecambe and Wise originally planned a story arc for season five of their BBC show in which Ern’s evil twin “Ernie Otherwise” would try to usurp his position as Eric’s best friend and comedy partner to Ern’s increasing frustration (Eric was always completely unaware that any substitution was going on).
It had been intended that the season would end with an epic...
Thoroughly Modern Nightmare
In adulthood bad dreams are more often exercises in anxiety, their imagined frustration, disappointment and despair so much worse than the monsters that pursued us in childhood.
As the digital age matures I have noticed a recurring anxiety dream taking on modern form; an old tale, but one re-imagined for the twenty first century.
I am trying to login. I am trying to reach a website, but no...
tentacular:
If our spans, like antique notebooks’, were contained by endpapers! Two, three days before a baby is born, a great flat page appearing in the prepared room, by the crib, silent, intently examined by parents-to-be. They strive to parse patterns. They might smile guardedly at gilt filigrees & pleasing coloured stock, wince at ogees or particular paisleys, seeing troubled...
Product recall
DOGMATIST poses injury hazard May 21 2011 13:54:00
The Dogmatist is a variant of the popular Homo Sapiens range.
The variant is physically indistinguishable from the standard model but can be identified by a faulty belief system.
Overuse of this belief system as well as attempts to impose it on other models can result in unexpected injury or death. Furthermore large populations of...
Recursive Arrogance Paradox
I always get annoyed when someone asks a (perfectly reasonable) question on an online forum only to be instantly shouted down and attacked, being told to “google for it”.
Oh fuck off.
The whole point of online forums, I would have thought, is to encourage information sharing and discussion about a specific subject. Where do you think you are more likely to find a quick answer to a...
Recurring Theme
I have a recurring dream. One of many in fact. I doubt there’s been any fresh programming on my dream channel for ages. But I digress.
This particular dream could take place anywhere and could have any number of diverse characters. The physical aspects are not what is recurring about it. It’s a feeling.
In the dream I am always wondering how another year has ended so quickly and...
